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Meet the parents :D- I finally brought someone home!

Hey Hey! 😀

I don’t think I ever mentioned this but here it is now. I have never brought a guy home to meet my parents!! :O:O:O

(the lions are just from my previous blog Meet the Parents click link below to read:

 https://thesweetestpartsoflove.wordpress.com/2017/10/17/meet-the-parentsfamily/)Yep in spite of 3boyfriends including the long term one I could never tell my family bout me dating….However lucky number 4 got to experience it first hand on his side as well as mine. This wasn’t particularly a proper meeting as it was an impulse for him to come collect me from for our date. It didn’t exactly go to plan but I do feel that the fact that I  even took this step means that I am really serious bout the Sweet One being in my life. I finally tried to be brave and take a bit more control of what I want. This meet was very short so I am planning to do this again maybe teatime or dinner or something when my siblings aren’t around so the Sweet One can talk to my parents. I know there may be somethings they wont approve of but all I need for now is the awareness and acceptance and as for the liking him stuff  that will come when they get to know him more.

Wish me luck! ;0)

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X x x

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The Thoughts of Disappointments

Hey Hey! 😀

I decided to share something else today and its more to do with my feelings of right now. I have explained in past posts about a new development in my Love life which is the Sweet One (although lately I’ve been thinking of him as the Sweet but Crazy One :0P) and how this relationship is slightly different to the others I’ve had. In this relationship my Sweet One is the one experiencing the new shiny stuff of relationships and I can see his eyes wide like a magpies at this rate and I just have these odd feelings I will fail as a girlfriend and a future life partner. I know that he will always be understanding to my craziness but it does not mean that my feelings that I could be a great disappointment to him ,of what Love and relationships are will disappear and it horrifies me that I could be the cause of his faith and trust as well as belief being damaged. In past relationships I have always made jokes about how I am “The Best Girlfriend Ever!” knowing full well I could never say it and mean it or even think it could be remotely true as the confidence in myself is lacking and it makes me wonder how I can be in a relationship at all.

Expectations and disappointments have a tendency to end up hand in hand sometimes and it jus makes you not want to get too hopeful or excited of what the future holds and in my case its this relationship. I really like the Sweet One and I know he could be good to me but I just cant bring my to expect too much from him and I know there must be expectations on his side but he will never say and I feel I should really know what they are so as not to be too much of a disappointment to him. I want to be a good girlfriend and hopefully a great future life partner where I can fill his life with happiness but there’s this little feeling in the back of my head that just feels I will never achieve that.  

Share Your Thoughts! 😀

X x x

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First Relationship- EVER!

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I have talked about many of my relationships and in all of them I’ve always been the least experienced one but this time round I’m apparently the “more experienced” one. The Sweet One has never been in a relationship before and had never dated anyone before me.

I have noticed somethings about the Sweet One and that is he is trying a lot harder then he needs to, most likely as he really doesn’t want this to fail, he seems quite clingy towards me, he is overly protective and very affectionate, All of these things I have noticed in myself at some point at the beginning of dating and its rather surreal being on the other end of it as I am now experiencing what the “other” other halves had to go through when they were me, I can say it does feel a little bit too much sometimes but as I always try to be as understanding as possible as I cant remember exactly how I was or even how much I was and if they put with me I guess its just a case of me doing the same… I mean that’s fair right ;0)

Growing up I always used to hear bout guys our age being immature or less experienced in how to treat a girl in a relationship and so girls used to opt for older men who were more experienced but I find that someone who hasn’t been in a relationship to be someone who may not always get things right but who is trying so hard to do so. He will always appreciate you, he wont cheat on you (well it seems unlikely if you are his first), he will always offer to help you, he will always want to be affectionate, he will talk to you for hours on end simply just to hear your voice and want to be around you and hold you close just because you are his and I think all of that is pretty sweet in itself.

Being the “more experienced” makes me feel a lot of pressure to know what I’m doing and to not break their heart by accident. I really don’t want to hurt him and its something I feel I might do and I have no idea why. Everything that we do together I want to make nice and special as if it was my first experience in dating and relationships I would want to make a big deal out of it and so I’m trying to make that happen for him. He has come to mean a lot to me and I don’t want to disappoint him in anyway.

Although things seem are a bit odd right now what with the constant want to be touching, close or even just nearby for as long as possible I do find that being around his company makes me feel more special as he wants to make the effort with me, he is excited about our relationship and I really feel that if he could he would do absolutely anything for me. He is in fact drowning quite badly and heaven knows why he things so highly of me but even though I’m still uncomfortable (I’m weird bout anything nice about me) I am flattered he likes me at all 😀  

Share Your Thoughts! 😀

X x x

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The Sweet One- The One I’m seeing now

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(BE WARNED ITS A LONG ONE)

I have mentioned before that i am seeing someone so I thought I would let you in on our little story… After meeting pretty much every guy I’ve dated or been in a relationship with online I actually met this one in person first.

About a year ago I remember first seeing the Sweet One at work and there was always something about him that I noticed, I’m not really sure what it was, he had his curly hair tied in a pony tail and he was wearing a hat and a hi vis vest but I could never really get a good look at his face. I still remember the first time I talked to him and I wasn’t sure what he was doing at work so I thought I would ask. He barely looked at my face so I assumed he was kind of shy so we had a very quick conversation and since then I always made an effort to say hi when I saw him. Funny enough during the time I put up my dating profile I did actually think about asking him if he wanted to go out but decided against it in the end thinking he wasn’t interested.

Fast forward to Winter last year…

There was a time when we managed to talk a bit more and at this time I was seeing the Long Haired one and I remember telling him about him and showing his picture and saying he reminded me of him. Mostly because of the hair and their names started with the same letter and other little things but in reality they were very different. During that conversation it came up that he had never been in a relationship before and we talked bout how I met the Long Haired one. After that he disappeared for a few weeks and I actually missed him and wondered what happened and when he came back I started to realise that I would go out my way to talk to him before I left work and I wanted to be his friend and I was definitely drawn to him. The Long Haired one and I were long distanced and I guess not having been together very long before we became long distanced, I realised I wanted attention that I wasn’t getting from him.

Coming up to December I started to realise I might actually have a crush on the Sweet One, I started to notice him a lot more at work and I started to think about him and it was never inappropriate thoughts, it was just thoughts in general. I felt so bad, I had never looked at anyone else when I’ve been in a relationship and to me it was not a good thing and I felt so ashamed. I decided to talk to a friend at work and she said its normal to have random crushes on people but it doesn’t mean anything as you aren’t doing anything you aren’t getting close or intimate with them but in spite of that I didn’t feel good. I realised it was insecurities otherwise I would never feel the need to notice anyone else but my significant other and so I felt it was important to discuss this with the Long Haired One.

After the craziness and the break up with the Long Haired one and after the process of grieving, I still couldn’t move from my thoughts bout the Sweet One and I thought it was better to find out if he might be interested or not, then fully move on and maybe stay single for a bit. I originally thought I would get my friend from work to talk to him but then I decided there was no way to really have a talk and maybe it might be better to write him a note. I told him my thoughts and asked him and left him my number and I was planning to give it to him before I left work, but towards the end of the day I decided he might not be interested. I headed off to go home but on the way out I bumped in to my friend and she tried to convince me to go and give it to him but then offered to do it herself and that’s how it happened I guess. When my friend came back she was all smiles and thumbs up and said he would text me after he was finished at work. He did text and even today I remember pretty much every word that started off us dating. This was the start of a new relationship…

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X x x

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Update on my Love Life!

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I have had a little update in the world of relationships and here I am putting my heart on the line to attempt a relationship once again. I have been hurt badly before and have been down the road of online dating and eventually found someone which was bit of a whirlwind and then who disappeared on me altogether in the past. Right now my update is that I now I have a BOYFRIEND 😀

This time round I’ve met someone in real life meaning not from online and we have both been talking everyday and meeting up when we can. I’m in an awkward place where I feel happy but afraid to let myself get too close and I guess previous experiences has now caused this, especially since with the Long Haired one I tried to put as much effort as I could in to it and ended up losing him after all. With this relationship I am going to take things as they come and try and keep a good enough balance.  

Share Your Thoughts! 😀

X x x

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Interracial Relationships

Hey Hey

I have always mentioned about different people I have met up with and how everyone has different beliefs and interests and so there are times when this is obvious to others and sometimes not acceptable. I have been in positions where people look at you weird or even if they know you feel its ok to tell you its not ok. In my head I have always been accepting of any kind of relationship as I’ve always believed that relationships and love have always come in many forms and so I would never feel that someone shouldn’t be together especially if they are happy.

Looking back at all my relationships I have always been with someone who was different from me in every single way as I don’t think looking for someone specifically the same as you is necessary as you might find someone you can make an amazing connection with just about anyone who may not be apart of your culture, religion or background. I think its important to keep an open heart when it comes to love in this way as you might miss out on something magic with someone you never thought you would end up with and someone you can share your own culture and background with as well as learn about theirs,

Share Your Thoughts! 😀

X x x

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Not So Sweet….When you are being taken advantage of

Hey Hey! 😀

What can I say I hear and read way too much about this sort of thing and it is not right at all but its something that exists and I do feel that’s its important to make these things known and not have them hidden. There are so many people out there whether they are people you know or people you hear about in the news who experience sexual assault and its just getting ridiculous how many people out there think its perfectly ok and how many people even choose to keep quiet about it.

People who are in positions with people they know whether its in a school environment, work environment or just out and about (or even your own home) its very difficult to know whether what’s happening is ok or not (As I am typing this I am sure people are getting confused by this but it will make sense in a minute) When you are around someone who you have to show respect for or in a position where you feel you need to be nice sometimes its hard to speak up for yourself without creating a scene or effecting things like jobs, education or even friendship. The mistake here is that you forget that you have self worth and respect for yourself and no one should feel its ok to disrespect you and you not do anything about it. Its not ok and its not right either. There are people that will help you and be understanding if you just tell someone and if possible tell the person themselves to back off and to stay away from you as it is unwanted attention. It isn’t necessary to swear or worry about coming off rude as you have every right to tell them exactly where to go as without your consent they should not be invading your personal space.

There is another thing that is why people keep quiet sometimes its not because of losing a job or anything like that sometimes its gaining a reputation or having friends judge you or disrespect you. This is something that confuses me a lot. If you are a victim in this what name will you gain when the person who is wrong is the one abusing you. This is another reason to speak up, if you don’t the other person will, they will tell people that it was you and they will make  the whole thing look like they didn’t do anything wrong at all and that you are just one of “those types” of people, whether you are male or female it can turn on you both so don’t think that you are ok either way. Speak up and make yourself heard and don’t feel ashamed when you aren’t wrong. Please be careful and look after yourself and make sure that people aren’t overstepping the mark

Share Your Thoughts! 😀

X x x