Hey Hey! 😀
I already wrote about one part of Lovers Tiff and that was preventing bad stuff in relationships. To see post please click link:
Now for part two, when you are actually having problems
Here it is just for you ;0)
These are things that I may not have dealt with as yet but I do think they are things to keep in mind.
This is for the worse end of problems, when you are acting on things in the wrong way, a very wrong way.
One thing you must remember is that just because you are having issues where you really hate each other, it doesn’t mean you should stop being civilised or even forget that at some point you do/did like this person.
You Still Love Them
Unless things have gotten so bad in your relationship, it is really important that you don’t forget who it is you are talking to. Sometimes in the heat of an intense conversation people start to get rude. This person is someone you Love and who you have a relationship with so you really need to keep it together. Try and think about how you would want them to talk and behave towards you and behave accordingly.You don’t want to lose this person after all.
This one should be fairly obvious but I can understand when you get frustrated, annoyed and irritated that the only way you feel you can get yourself heard or show you are right is by being the loudest. But who is that really helping? If you have children I’m sure you don’t want them involved with you and your partners issues and I’m sure you don’t want your neighbours to hear things either, especially if they like a good old gossip :0). What I have been told and what has always stuck in my mind is that if you keep your voice calm and steady, even if the other person is boiling up and still raging, just keep your tone the same and eventually they will start speaking at the same level as you. Once you are at the same level then you can try to talk about things and hopefully solve the problem.
One thing most people like to do is that when there are certain issues that have not been solved or something that was unfair they like to bring it up in the new problems and arguments. Don’t do it!! It is spiteful and evil and shows that you can never let go of the past and move on. If it is something that is bugging you that much then it should be discussed in a separate conversation. One topic for one argument. Leave the past in the past during disagreements and arguments otherwise it’ll only inflame things more.
Don’t Damage their stuff
Never involve any belongings or special items of theirs or you both as it will only cause more problems. It might make you feel better at the time but you will regret it after. Possessions mean a lot to people and destroying them for the sake of being right or an argument will make them never forget what you did. Again remember who this person is and what they mean to you and how would you feel if they did the same to you.
Don’t hit them
Hopefully it won’t come to this and if it does then it is important you get the required help as domestic violence is a very serious thing. I have a link here for any one who wishes to use it http://www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk/
Calling them names!
This one is very petty and calling names usually is the truth twisted or something your partner already knows about themselves. Best to not go there! Calling names is what children do to insult each other and it can become very hurtful, but the one person it’ll hurt more is you. Just don’t do it. Control that tongue!! .
Many relationships even when you don’t live together or are even married involve children and pets. “People” that you both Love and share relationships with. The first thing you shouldn’t do is involve them in your fights, making them choose between you or your partner. It isn’t fair on them and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be put in that position with your own parents, so try and think about how you would feel. If you don’t live together don’t take your dog or baby away from your partner, it’s spiteful and evil. Try and solve things under the same roof and keep everything as normal as possible for them.
Being right is not important, try and solve things as much as possible. Communication is the key and also that arguments and disagreements in couples makes your relationship stronger. Hang in there!!
Share your thoughts!
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